t.m.i. tuesday

because its my blog... and i do what i want.

i am going to tell the tale of a very painful, nerve racking, disturbing experience yesterday and surprisingly it has nothing to do with kids...

so after teaching all day and baking cookies for my teachers bday, i had to go to my bi-monthly torture session aka student teaching seminar. we were moved from our spacious room fit with desks and arm room to a cramp mini-theater style suffocation holding chamber. i chose the seat second from the end by this guy i know (i thought it would be awkward if i chose the end seat bc it would be me saying "i really dont want to sit beside you" and chose the second to the end seat beside him which now that i think about it is probably more awkward, but i digress). so anyway, this red-headed fellow comes in late and naturally the only open seat is the one i didnt choose to my left. i would say he had an awkwardness about him but it was subtle. 

this is when the disturbing event takes place...

said fellow chews and i mean GNAWS his fingernails for the next TWO HOURS STRAIGHT. and when i say two hours... i mean CONSTANTLY. it was so ridiculous, i looked on my watch to time him. 

he was using his other hand to position the thumb nail so that he could get the best gnawing angle. he was spitting fingernail pieces on the floor, wiping them on his shirt and pants. he was making noises kind of like when sunny licks and chews her feet. he was turning his head to get the best advantage on his nails, i mean he was really getting down on them! i kept thinking, "there is no way he has anything left to chew" but how wrong was i! i am not exaggerating for the sake of a story on this one... he really did chew his nails the ENTIRE time. cant you tell how disturbed i am???

so not only being grossed out by the noises and the flicking of chewed fingernail shards, the only thing i could think of was, "he's been at a school all day." if you havent been to a school lately, they are like living petri dishes. kids coughing, spitting, picking noses, using the bathroom... and turning the same door knob as him. i wanted so badly to bring someone else's attention to the situation so that they could suffer with me. i kept looking at the dude to give him a hint but he was in the zone. i really contemplated just telling him but im not heartless.

we had two guest speakers... one of which was very interesting and enjoyable but i couldnt fully concentrate on them because red to my left was having the thanksgiving dinner of nail chewing.

still completely disturbed... and grossed out.


text message conversation:
me: pants on the ground, pants on the ground.
greg: yep.
greg: what made you think of that?
me: well i wanted to send you a text though i had nothing to say. so it was either pants on the ground or you are my sunshine. the choice was obvious.
greg: yes it was...


Elizabeth said...

Ohh, I had to scan your story because your vivid description of red was making me cringe! I am sure witnessing that live was even worse!

Kellie said...

Oh wow...that was really funny.